Long time no book review (almost a year maybe?) and I decide to start with what will probably end up being my favourite book of the year. Because who even am I if I don't make my life harder? I am not sure if I will ever be able to write a coherent review for My Husband by Maud Ventura anyway.
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| ★★★★★ |
The thing about My Husband is that I felt from the first paragraph that I will adore this book. Then I kept reading and kept reading and it was better and better and I knew this book was the perfect book for me. It was such a great book! And then the final chapter happened and suddenly the book became ten times better! I did not think that was possible . It's the book that has exceeded all my expectations when my expectations were already very high!
"I can't hope for anything more, I can't hope for anything better, and yet the void that I feel is immense, and I am always waiting for him to fill it. But what could possibly fill what is already full?"
Love or Obsession? Does It Even Matter?
In this novel, we spend a week in the mind of the wife, our unnamed narrator. And she has it all: the looks, the career, the beautiful house, the ideal family, yet everything in her world is consumed by her husband. From how she looks to how she acts, how she decorates the entryway in the perfect way to make his coming home just perfect, how she stops watching TV and arranges herself in the best position on the couch, sitting with a book she is not reading, just so her husband finds her that way... Everything is about him or for him.
We have the honour to witness her inner monologue throughout all this. And what a ride that is! Going from ecstasy to despair, switching from joy to self-doubt. It's an exhausting journey, but such a delicious one.
Love As Cold Analysis
Everything she does is calculated - from the colour of her blouse (which must always match the day) to what she orders when she has a spontaneous lunch (or is it?) with her husband - by the way, did he just check that waitress's ass? Why did she compare her to a clementine at the dinner party the other night? Will he sleep with her tonight? And, oh, how he will suffer should he forget to tell her goodnight.
Her entire existence is consumed by her husband. She over analyses everything the man does or says. And there will be little passive-aggressive ways to punish him if he does not comply with these unwritten unshared rules she has for their life. Sometimes she will simply not hug him goodbye, other times...
"Sometimes I ask myself whether I should feel guilty about going through my husband's things. But I always come to the conclusion that I should not, for one simple reason: I wish he would do the same. I would finally have the proof of his jealousy and the confirmation of his commitment. Unfortunately, I know he doesn't. Unfortunately, my husband trusts me."
No Plot, Just Vibes
This book is dark and strange, a captivating psychological novel. Our narrator is unhinged! She is the cool girl from Gone Girl's Amy's monologue. And that last chapter! Ugh! I will keep this post spoiler free, but I did not see that chapter coming. At. All.
Just read it! But beware, this book will not be everyone's cup of tea. It is different, it is refreshing, it is unexpected, but it's definitely an acquired taste kind of reading.
"In reality, marriage didn't calm me down. I realised at the very moment we said "I do" that my husband could still divorce me. Then I hoped that he would want to buy a house with me, and then have a child with me, certain that these acts would be more solid than a contract signed at city hall or a promise made before God. I was constantly awaiting the next step. I discovered a world of proofs of love, with commitment everywhere and love nowhere. And fifteen years after our first date, I still sleep just as poorly."
My Husband by Maud Ventura was first published in August 2021
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